Can the magic of Cagemas overcome the most rote Nicholas Cage vehicle we’ve ever discussed, The Humanity Bureau? Meanwhile, Stuart reminisces about the Cage days of his youth, Dan writes a happy ending for some Foodfight! characters, and Elliott sets down some strict boundaries surrounding his son’s bath time.

We talk about the inexplicably star-studded comedy, The Bigfoot Who Saved Christmas. Excuse us, “Pottersville.” Meanwhile, Stuart brags about his back strength, Dan uncovers the world of Raising Cain conventions, and Elliott goes on his longest (most infuriating?) bit ever.

Why is Bruce Willis starring in an NRA recruitment video? Wait, this is a MOVIE? Are you sure? We talk about Death Wish. Meanwhile, Elliott writes the horror movie “Dr. Sleepypants,” we get insight into Stu’s endless Critters gifs, and Dan shows off his kaleidoscopic character work, during pie talk.

Remember that surprisingly well-defined contest Elliott spearheaded a few episodes back? Well the contest winner decided what we should watch, and it was Interview with the Vampire. Will we fall victim to its bloodsucking charms? Meanwhile, Elliott apologizes to goths, Stuart lists a few Ecks vs. Sever sequels, and Dan disputes the very premise of the movie.

It’s our second SHOCKTOBER episode (not that you’d know it, because Dan keeps forgetting to plug in the fucking Shocktober theme)! This time, we return to the social media horror well, with Friend Request. Meanwhile, Elliott gives a peek behind the curtain of Teddy Ruxpin fanatics, Stuart tells us what this movie really should be called, and Dan… well we’re still mad at Dan for NOT PUTTING IN THE GODDAMN SHOCKTOBER THEME.

We close out Smalltember with one of our “favorite” genres: the ill-conceived, micro-budgeted computer animated film. And Dwegons and Leprechauns is a horrific, fever dream of a doozy. Meanwhile, Dan remains the master of the unintended double entendre, Stuart ponders what “dweg” means, and Elliott insists we kill a Muppet.

For our first Smalltember episode of 2018, we discuss Slamma Jamma, the film about slam dunking your way to Jesus. Meanwhile, Elliott gives us some hat-wearing etiquette, Dan is upset that the characters aren’t criminal masterminds, and Stuart sets everything right by making it clear he’s just kidding.

The Peaches are still on their life-mandated summer break, so we bring you this second live episode, straight from the Historic Sixth & I Synagogue in Washington, D.C. We’ll be back with normal episodes soon, we promise! Until then, enjoy Geostorm!